Tuesday, June 30, 2015

Well That Was Exciting

Had our main computer go belly up. Or more like it was in a self-destruct count down that we weren't aware of and every time we turned it on, it thought to itself - soon, and then silently cackled. Naturally, it would have to be to itself, because I would lose it if the computer just started to cackle. I would hose it down with holy water, or maybe just water, and tell the devil to come out of it. Or possibly pull all the wires out of it and chuck it out the front door.

But I digress.

Nicholas turned on the suicide computer and he said it sounded like it was winding up for lift off. I'm no expert, but that can't be a good sign. I guess it went on to make all kinds of groans and noises that I had to ask if smoke was pouring out of it. I was given that look that only I can get. That look that screams "are you for real?!?"

I would like to take this moment to point out I am not a fan of that look. So much so, that I feel it forces me to amp up whatever it is I'm doing just so I can remain queen of the dork. It's moments like this I have the urge to call my parents and apologize for being a teenager and then thank them for surviving as that gives me hope I'll survive.

I decided to take a nap instead because I have a feeling my mother would not be merciful on that conversation.

So we got a new-ish computer tower and it has worked very well. I'll leave off this is the first chance I've had to sit down at it as other people were hogging it and my work schedule is strange. I had no idea what type of a panic I would have as I had to try and remember all my bookmarks. Plus, I had my grocery shopping list template like thing to re-do. And that is a royal pain in the buuutttt it's worth it.

I know. That was lame. I have no excuse. I'm running on very little sleep. I'm not sure what new phase this is but I can barely stay awake till midnight, but I'm awake at 5:30 a.m. For a night owl like me, I feel like my body is pulling some shady betrayals.  I blame it on I had to close the last 3 nights and closing just kicks any and all ambition out of me. I have the next few days off and today my body was like I ain't moving! You'll just have to pee on yourself cuz not.moving!! Which is going to be odd since I need to go grocery shopping.

I'm sure you can just pick up on the glee and excitement from there.

But something that I'm still feeling giddy about is I put in my 2 weeks notice. We have so much stuff going on that I'm not available to do much. Still waiting on a closing date but it may just be a couple weeks away. And just tons of stuff to do. I thought I would be feeling more relief but instead I'm battling feeling overwhelmed. If that wasn't enough I had a few nights last week where I was just gripped with fear and lots of what ifs. Not fun to walk through it, but it has certainly been an opportunity to invite Jesus into the middle of it so I can get healed and move along.

I was actually surprised to hear how upset all my co-workers were when they heard the news I was quitting. I mean, like come up and hug me and tell me that my smile made their day and they didn't know how they would go on without me to make them laugh. That took me by surprise. There are many times that it feels like the stuff I do day in and day out doesn't mean a hill of beans to anyone. So to get this huge out-pour from people who don't really know me that well knocked me for a loop. I know I've made them laugh - some of the stuff I've pulled and said over the headsets have left them all in stitches. Some of the cutting counter ladies will come up to me and said I made them laugh so bad one night that people thought they were all crazy. I can't help it. Humor is the only way I know how to cope. I'm going to miss my co-workers, but I am so not going to miss that job!

I do find it interesting that everyone wants to know what job I'm going to do next. I was briefly thinking about transferring to the other store, but I heard the manager is kind of a jerk. The only reason I was considering it was from all the fear that decided to hop up and down on my head. All I'm getting from God lately is "make yourself available" and "get ready" with no other details. I can't say as that makes me warm and fuzzy with this peaceful blanket enveloping me. More like this wonder of is that a good thing or a bad thing? How do you get ready for something you don't know? I had this weird dream like I was playing Wheel of Fortune and I kept asking for some vowels because there wasn't much of a sentence going on. Then I had a dream that I was a rabbit that was going all Sherlock looking for clues.

I have this horrible feeling it's all a strange cry for help but I can't seem to piece it all together. Not really. I just think dang I have issues and roll over and go back to sleep. Who has dreams like these??? Anyone? Yeah. Didn't think so. Gah!

And I've held Fred back for as long as I can on his crazy packing ways. We both have tomorrow off and I know what this means. I will have to stop him from trying to pack up the kitchen. I'm not complaining too hard. Dude has a gift. He won't let anyone help him pack but there is a reason. I can ask him where something was from 3 houses ago if we still have it and where is it. It takes him about a minute to remember where it ended up, and then goes and brings it back! It is truly something to behold. Yet he can't remember the 3 things I send him to the store for. Never fails. 2 or 3 things, he will forget something. Makes my head hurt. But we've always joked it takes both of us to make 1 normal person. Except you could probably question how normal that person is but that's a whole different story.

Hopefully we won't have another drama filled move this time. That last one - oh my word! I've been telling Fred he better stay healthy and he, of course, caught a bit of a head cold and we've all been avoiding him and making him take Vitamin C. Don't want to get hit with the plague again especially right when we need to move. And here's something weird. I've had lots of people offer to help us move. Come again??? I'm not really sure how to respond to that. Part of me is so use to people not being there that I'm like yeah, okay we'll see if you actually show up. And then the other part of me feels all panicky because I'm like how are we supposed to feed people?!?

Drama. I don't save it for my mama. I tend to let it kick me in the can and then back up over my head so I can feel all overwhelmed and refuse to come out of my blanket fort.

Tuesday, June 9, 2015


Because that is the sound you make when you are on a roller-coaster ride. Either that or AAAAHHH!! but I've already used that for a blog post title. I'm not really sure I've caught up with everything that has gone down this last month. And believe me, there was a lot of stuff and a lot of angst shoved in there for good measure. As only I can do with life, I guess.

Seriously hope you have a snack to carry you through, because this is going to be long. Matter of fact, close your eyes for just a few seconds to try and rest them up for this. Ya good? Good.

Right after J's b-day, serious teenage angst went down. For days. I'm standing there listening to the rants telling myself that jail isn't worth it and stripes really aren't my thing, so I needed to hear them out. Suddenly everything I say is crippling and damaging. I already know I've struggled with my tone of voice - I've joked I come from a long line of screamers. And I have been guilty of having a pretty hard bark. But when I come home from work and their chores aren't done and all they've done is goof off? Well, honey, buckle up for that chewing cuz y'all earned it! In their defense, that has only happened twice.

But the problem I'm having is they are constantly assuming they know what I'm thinking. I told their dad he has not taught them well if they think they can know what a woman is thinking. Talk about pressure! Now I have to stop and second guess myself over everything I'm saying. Then I get irritated and just end up saying nope, and let er rip! I had one say to me, you said this and I'm like, no I didn't. I said this. Well that means you think this. Noooo it doesn't! I never said that, thought that, or implied that!
Fred had to stepped in and said you guys are falling into a trap most men make. The main woman in your life is not your be all, end all. You guys can't look to your mom to validate you. That's not her responsibility or any woman for that matter, you have to get that from God. He then proceeded to pull out every John Eldridge book we own and told them to have it. I think M is more than half way through everything. A miracle has happened as N has picked up a book as well - voluntarily. And it's also a miracle Fred stepped in and calmed everyone down. Wait, that's not really a miracle because he just does that without really trying. It was just a miracle he was around when a major angst rant went down. But they've seemed to all chill so yay for John's books coming through again! (His book Killing Lions is really, really good for guys just leaving high school and collage age.)

We heard from our car insurance company. The guy is STILL in the hospital. He's having a lot of respiratory issues. About the time he gets out of ICU and into a room, he gets an infection and back down he goes. But they did get a lawyer and filed a claim. Thankfully our insurance company has decided to pay it to protect us. I have mixed emotions about it but want to just put it behind us and move forward. The lady did try to make us feel better as she said the guy isn't an upstanding citizen and has a very long history of criminal activities so we shouldn't feel bad. What can you say to that? And dude is white, so nobody better start any race junk.

Another round of angst was getting the mortgage company to commit. They finally said yes the day before we were to sign another year lease with the worthless rental company. A house popped up a few days before this that we were REALLY wanting, but it was sold the day before we were able to go house hunting. Talk about disappointing! We did find a house. Kitchen needs an update but other than that we are thrilled with it and we'll be moving in July. Tons of stuff has been going on regarding all that.

What has cracked me up is the guys picking out paint color for their rooms. Typical Fred - came home with like 10 books of paint samples. You should have seen the struggle and careful consideration that was going on. Who knew watching all this back and forth was going to be so entertaining? Except for J who took a whopping 1 minute to pick out a color verses M took days. N picked out the same color combo we had in our den at our old house. He changed his mind when I pointed that out because the green was more green than olive as the paint sample shows. But we're laughing because they all picked out different colors but all in the grey tone. They are their father's sons.

However, it's looking like we aren't going to have a whole lot of time to get in and get a lot of painting done before we move in. My mom, who is addicted to pain fumes, is all giddy with coming in and helping. J's room is going to need primer first as obnoxious green needs to go bye-bye real fast. Seems to be the in color. Every house we saw had green. Some a nice green and some not so nice. Like this bright celery green color.

Now the kickster. This house is like less than 5 minutes from a different Joann's store. Not the one I work at. I want to quit. I felt like God was telling me I needed to make myself available especially for the guys as 1 car 2 people thing is going to get challenging here real quick. Me working has helped out a lot. I like most of my coworkers a lot, but the customers about drive me batty. I've been told I can transfer to the closer store, otherwise if I quit and need to get a job again, I'm looking at another 3 months before I get hired. If I do put in for a transfer, I feel the honorable thing to do is go through with it. I don't want to get to new store and say just kidding! I was talking with all the guys and I said I know I'm scared. I'm scared of moving to something new and have more crap show up and not have a way to pay for it.

I've been wrestling with this for months. When overtime is available - Fred is all over it and we're doing good. But we all know overtime isn't always available. So that makes me nervous. And just like satan - I get a text from someone and she goes for it. Can you afford not to work? I can't really repeat what I wanted to say. I should have responded with thanks satan for asking! But I have a feeling it would have flown over her head. And probably caused some angst.

We were all praying last night and N called me out on being afraid. He was right. He had a word for me and it rang true. Gosh, whoever raised these guys really did do a few thing right! Now I just have to tell the main boss lady I'm quitting soon. If I told her I was quitting now, I'm pretty sure she would kill me on the spot as we have inventory next week. I'm going to finish out the month. Which is a good thing because I came home from work and Fred has an abscessed tooth and will finally be going to a dentist. He's only had a couple busted teeth for like 10 years and is horribly addicted to gummy bears. I can't even say I told you so because I've been an enabler.

And top it off, the worthless rental company is slapping us with a $700 bill to pay for the busted windows they never replaced from the neighborhood jerks. They are giving us till the end of the week to pay it and they won't take our phone calls. To say I'm livid is an understatement. Their lease is worded to screw over the tenant at every possible angle. Last week the whole basement flooded. Nailed our bedroom again. And why does it flood? Because they refuse to replace the back basement door and won't put in new drain pipes like it has been recommended several times over. So the water builds up at the back door and when the drain backs up out front, it pours through. I came home from work, got dinner done, we all ate, and here came the flood gates. Fred was at work so the guys had to help haul the shop vac up the stairs and dump it.

I feel like all I'm seeing is dollar signs for everything. I'm trying not to bust out the ramen noodles and tell everyone to eat PB sandwiches. Because these years have been hard. Devastatingly hard. The ride has been bumpy. Matter of fact, I'm pretty sure we've gone off the rails a few times to boot. And all you can do is hang on and hope you don't crash and burn. The weird thing is I've learned you can rise again even after the crashing and the burning. Although I'm not sure what it says about me that now I make sure to always have a bag of marshmallows ready to roast in case of anymore burning.
Does this mean I'm carpe diem-ing? Or I'm more messed up than what I think?

Friday, May 8, 2015

Limbo, Limbo, Limbo!!

Sounds like some sort of a dance. When did my life decide to take dancing lessons?!? And did it forget it has 2 left feet?

Not much news in a bunch of areas, so random smoosh because this is the only shot I have at making a blog post.

Found out the guy that Fred hit is still in the hospital with respiratory failure and has been on a vent. Yikes! We've been praying for his full recovery. And also that God would heal his brain for thinking he can walk in the road wearing dark clothes at 6 in the morning. Not that I'm bitter about it. I think it's more floored that someone would be that stupid.

The whole thing made it in the news. Pictures of Fred's car with the busted windshield on all the local channels was a bit surprising. I think what surprised us the most is how it was repeatedly reported that the driver stayed on the seen and was cooperating with police. Really? I guess it is very common and the cops were truly surprised he stayed and called the cops himself. He followed all the instructions of the operator and was about ready to preform CPR when the cops showed up and took over. I still feel really bad for the guy's family - someone has been in his room with him no matter what time of day it has been. I hope if they are in a suing mood they'll sue the city for not having sidewalks in that area and leave Fred out of it.

As if all that wasn't fun to deal with we've been having the water heater going out. Took the rental company a couple weeks to replace it. It was a toss up of did we have hot water or just kidding! Fred had a few days where he didn't have a shower because the scene from Groundhog Day where the guy leaps out of the shower came to mind.

Good times.

Said no one.


I was at work last week and I was standing over an open drawer of patterns when I bumped my hand and the diamond in my wedding ring flew out. I looked down at the drawer and promptly muttered sh!t! We were about ready to leave for the night, the patterns were the last thing we were working on and now this. Thankfully I found the diamond, not in the drawer after we took the whole thing apart, but it had flew behind the stack of patterns I was putting away.

Then I had to suffer through a week without my rings because none of my rings will fit that finger. I felt so exposed and nekkid! I even had someone ask me if I was going through a divorce after noticing my lack of rings. I told my sad tale of woe to the nosy creeper. I'm always surprised and what people notice and have the gull to comment about. I then took slight pleasure informing her that her stack of coupons had all expired. Another moment where my issues decided to show up and top someone else's crazy.

It's not a competition, Joanna! Although in my defense if you had any idea how many times a shift I get comments about my name you would understand why I bring the crazy. There is only so many times before I go all extra snarky and bring it. Because this is what I hear and I have replied with this depending on the mood and the person because there are just people who can't take a joke.
"Hey do you own the store?" Why yes, yes I do. I'm just really into customer service.
"Are you the actual Jo-Ann?" No. I have an A on the end so clearly I can't be her even though she technically doesn't exist as the name was a combination of 2 daughters.
"Are you undercover boss?" Yes, and the A on the end is part of my secret identity.
"Since it's your store can you give us an extra discount?" Ah-ha- no.
"Do they give you an extra discount for your name?" No, but I have asked. Repeatedly.
"You should just have an arrow on your name tag pointing to the logo on the apron." No, because that will only confuse the mentally challenged people who would then ask me why is my name arrow, or if that was a symbol for peace in another language.

I wish I was kidding.

And before you say no one can be that ditzy than come on down to the city! Because we have every type of nut job you can imagine and a handful that you can't! Like the lady that cussed her phone out....in Klingon. Or the couple that were dressed like ghost-busters. I can make a list. But I don't have time. That's how long the list would be.

But Fred found a jewelry designer who not only fixed it, but made it better. Even resized the anniversary band and just made it look better than it ever did AND he didn't rake us over the coals. Whole thing cost us under a 100 bucks! Super happy! Turned a crappy situation into a wonderful blessing.

And speaking of blessing - we celebrated Jared who is now 16! Dude is still hilarious. He certainly can make any situation better to go through just through his shenanigans. He continues to be joy to be around even when he's being a bit a twerp. He's now 2 inches taller than Fred but those 2 will wrestle to the point where I'm concern for the furniture. My folks came down to wish him a happy b-day and the in-laws will be rolling in sometime tonight for a weekend visit.

Hoping for a good weekend and some nice weather, all while I try not to think about all the other junk floating out there. Because LIMBO!! Now I must do a conga line singing limbo, limbo, lim-bo!
OR I'll just lay down and take a nap. That sounds better.

Tuesday, April 21, 2015

Well Dunk My Butt In A Bucket Of Vinegar And Call Me A Pickle

Because we are in a pickle....again.

Why can't I seem to get it through my head that I'm not a normal person and therefore don't get to experience normal things in a normal way??? Normal people apply for a mortgage and provide their paperwork and done. For us? Not even close!

If you've been through a foreclosure, most lenders will turn you down flat. Doesn't matter that it was later determined that you were wrongfully foreclosed on because that doesn't show up on your credit report. You only get to apply for "special programs" for losers people like you.  It turns out that you can't even think of getting a mortgage until it has been 3 years after your house was yanked out from under you the sheriff's sale. We sat for 2 years in foreclosure status before that even happened. And heaven help you if your loan officer turns out to be a douche bag turd blossom like ours has been who has dragged his feet every.step.of.the.way. and doesn't bother to let you know little things like what paperwork is needed or if you're approved or not. Fred has had to email this guy constantly to get updates.

Our sad tale of woe had to go before an underwriter and special committee which we were supposed to know the outcome of all that weeks ago. We found out that the first committee turned us down because said turd blossom didn't bother to tell them the dates and all that jazz, so they thought we were a couple months shy of the okay we'll look in your general direction period. Had to get a copy from from old city to prove it has been more than 3 years and we are in the clear. We think he was going to let us get turned down without much of an explanation. Since Fred was on top of it, they are re-reconsidering. That was 2 weeks ago and we've heard nothing. Time marches on and we have to renew our lease with the worthless rental company by the end of this month. It's not looking good.

That banging noise you hear is me slamming my head into a wall to just end it all. Especially since all the houses we were looking at have all sold while they make up their minds. Which is confusing because we thought we already had approval for the loan or we never would have gone house hunting to begin with so there's that pickle. Since the guy tends to avoid us when there is bad news, we've come to the conclusion it's not going to happen. I think they are hoping we'll just slink away back to our sad little hole because how can he justify stringing someone along like that? We've already come up with Plan Q, which may stand for quit making plans because they don't work out.

Another pickle is last week - I can't even remember what day it happened - Thursday, I think? Fred was on his way to work about 6 a.m. It was dark, raining, no street lights, busy street. He got over into the lane for the highway ramp and there was a man walking in the street and Fred hit him. Fred is fine, the guy is still in ICU. The cops have said it wasn't Fred's fault, but we're still upset over the whole thing. The guy was wearing dark clothes, no flashlight to warn people he was there. That guy was going to get hit. It's too bad it was Fred. Car insurance won't pay for squat because we have everything but collision. But they have informed us that if we get sued by the guy they will handle all of it. Come again?

It was that last part that sort of made me snap. I asked if we could sue the guy for damaging our car and for being an idiot for walking in the road, in dark clothes while it was dark out. I've been told that's kind of cold so it sounds like that's a no. The car is fine, just needs a new windshield and we'll have to live with the dent in the hood for now. The frustrating part is we just got the guys' car back from the shop and now Fred is driving it until we can get the new windshield. Part of me is like yay we were prepared for once, while the other part is you got to be #@$! kidding me!!!! I don't blame him for not wanting to drive his car until it's fixed. I'm praying he doesn't relive the whole thing over and over. He's picked up a lot of overtime, I'm hoping that keeps him busy so he's not constantly thinking about it. He had to find another way to go to work because idiots down here walk in busy streets and act like they own the road.

All of this is right after me coming back from the homeschool convention. It was wonderful! We had tons of laughs, lots of encouragement, and I felt some serious nudges. But I'm really confused by those nudges. Mom is the heart of the home - she knows the pulse and what all is going on, but that only happens if she's actually home. (And not distracted but that's a whole different blog post.) I already know this and I haven't been happy at all about our current situation. I sort of got crappy with God saying hey, you want me home - make it happen. And then I came home to all this other mess going on and that just makes my head hurt even more.

Then my mother calls and goes off on me about the guys. I know our situation isn't normal, nor ideal, but it is what it is. And something new I'm facing, all those congratulations for homeschooling have now turned into digs about what are the guys doing NOW?! I'm still a firm believer to ask 19 year olds to figure out the rest of their lives has to be some form of insanity. They better know before they strap on all that debt of a student loan, because I know a lot of people that are having to work 2 jobs just to barely survive and for what? Most of them did not pursue or couldn't get a job in the field of their degree. So to just go to college because it's the normal thing to do? Well....that leaves me questioning normal. Seeking wisdom and putting together a plan doesn't seem to fit well with most people's normal.

Then again, all our plans have gone up in smoke, so apparently my 2 cents worth doesn't mean much.

There have been pluses and once a few more things line up, things are going to shift here. Although, it turns out the twins are better teachers than I am because Jared is already done with his schoolwork and is on summer break thanks to all their help. And Nicholas has everything graded! I should have put him in charge years ago! They've all stepped up and had to do stuff to help out that they normally wouldn't have had to do. So yay for learning lessons! But things need to shift and my problem is I wanted it to shift months ago. The guys were teasing me that I'm just presented with another opportunity to strengthen my patience muscle. Which I said they are still alive so my muscles are fully developed. That and I said bite me, can't wait to see you in the real world and how you get to put this into practice yourself.

We've known for many years I'm not the mature one of the group, but I still have Jared beat....by a little bit.

And in the midst of all this, God has put a few people on my heart to really pray for and to encourage them. Not exactly sure how well that is going to be received. I was in a session with Heidi St John and oh my gosh she is hilarious. She has a way of smacking you upside the head but not in a mean way. It was just truth and in a funny way, but when you really thought about what she said you realized you just got smacked. Things like not being distracted and really being there. Because we've all been there but not there, if you know what I mean. I'm taking notes like crazy and the whole time I felt like the Holy Spirit was saying so and so would really be encouraged by this. I'm all like, well they aren't here so sucks to be them, and kept going. Until it came time to buy some of those sessions on CDs. I felt that weight press on me and it was like I just lost 10 rounds of rock, paper, scissors and we hadn't even started yet. Nice to see I've matured somewhat and bought the CDs. We'll leave off that they are still sitting in the backpack and I haven't unpacked it yet. I got through step one with little resistance, so that has to count for something, right? Right?

I see a few things down the road that I need to make myself be available for, and I'm not sure how to make that happen. Sitting back and waiting on God to make it happen has not worked at all. Matter of fact, things got a lot worse until I said, 'fine, screw you I'll do it myself.' Not saying that is the best attitude to have, but there have been a lot of learning lessons along the way that makes me wonder if that was His intention all along and I was just a bit slow to pick up on it. For starters, God has been all over me about being bitter. My first response was me? Bitter? Ya think? I've been informed that was proving the point and the fact that I've so willingly embraced it is a problem. The sad thing is I actually wanted to justify why I was bitter and list all the reasons why....which...sounds......so.........bitter. 

Not fun to pickle myself with all the emotional stews we have going on. I hope someday all of this will make sense. I mean, I can't be the only cucumber out there that is surprised to find it has turned into a pickle. And the irony is I don't like pickles.

Tuesday, March 24, 2015

The Hunt

House Hunting! A fun little game that will cause you to feel happiness, dread, anxiety, the need for chocolate, therapy, and the realization that you might need marital counseling. To say the last few weeks have been a whirlwind would be an understatement. Cuh-razy! It seems that everyone and their brother is out house hunting right now.

We had a lovely list only to have half the list disappear as there were already offers on the table. One of the first houses we looked at had an offer right after we viewed it. It was too small for us, but it was a bit weird to see things go that fast. That's sort of been depressing. We've been searching the web, have things marked, send it to our realtor only to get an email back that it sold already.

Well, okay then.

We had two contenders which we could make work. Nothing has screamed this is the one! At least not in our price range. Both are split levels. I don't like split levels. I'm living in a split level currently because I am allergic to being homeless. While I know I can make it work - I'm still not thrilled. But if I were to take a moment and be honest, I don't think I would be thrilled with anything short of an HGTV miracle. I think my issues are showing again. That and I'm spending too much time on Pinterest drooling over huge kitchens that would make Martha Stewart say, "Now that's a nice a kitchen!" And my budget won't met Martha half way.

It's moments like this I'm glad we got rid of cable. No remodel shows for me! Because one of the houses we had marked on our list to look at was in desperate need of an update. It also smelled like Granny had recently passed away, but I'm trying not to be creeped out by it. I've been told paint and new carpet will get rid of the smell and to stop being a baby about it.


It has a lot of potential, but all I saw was a ton of work. We were later talking about it and I surprised myself when I blurted out I'm just not mentally up for a massive home overhaul. I feel like I'm stretched thin. I'm stressed out about work because they don't have enough people to handle the store, so we are running on skeleton crews. The store is a mess, customers are mad, and the workers are all frazzled. The thought of tackling anything right now makes me want to crawl into bed and not come out for at least a year.

The only bright spot in all of this is the two houses are on the other side of Indy hopefully away from all the ghetto and potholes that lead to China with a slight delay in hell. At least that was the case until yesterday morning three more homes popped up that have higher points than the other two we were considering.

Clearly the need for chocolate is screaming right now, but I'm back to being happy that there are some more options.

The marital issues have been interesting because we had a couple houses that we walked through only to have one say, "I love it!" while the other one is saying, "I hate it!" and the equal looks of horror have been comical. One house that Hubby was insisting we look at is only something he could pull. Think old, lonely, once upon a time grand dame with her paint chipping here and there with no means for a new do. You should have seen his instant look of love while my look screamed, "Run Forrest, Run!" I'll give the guy credit - tons of potential, but I'm fast to remember yesteryear of living through something you're trying to fix up with limited funds. N-O! Not only no, but hell no! I'm not sure he's forgiven me yet. The property taxes on this thing is just nuts, not to mention I got the vibe that there is potential of monumental expenses creeping under some of that peeling paint.

Jared had been totally against this house as it screams Allegan house all over again - only no where near as dumpy. Michael sided with his dad as they drooled over all the details of the house and Nicholas remained neutral, for once, and took the stance that ANYTHING is better than what we've lived in. Imagine the struggle J and I both had when we had to keep our facial muscles normal when we heard it's now pending thus taken off the market.

Oh darn.

So this leaves 2 split-levels. One built in the 60s and one built in the 80s. The 60s home is bigger but needs a new kitchen. The 2 full bathrooms are small. If we could do a new kitchen - it would be nice, but those bathrooms have been updated and will always be small. It has a lot of character - not a cookie cutter house. The neighborhood is non ghetto. The 80s house isn't too far from this one but it's smaller. But the kitchen is totally new. Small but all new appliances because down here people don't take their appliances I guess. 3 full bathrooms that are big, but the entrance way is horrible, Jared's room would be just a fuzz smaller than what he has now, and there is less square footage.

The hard thing is we have a really nice frig that has been sitting out in the garage that we can't wait to use again. I have an island that I'm sure my mom would pummel me if I got rid of and we could use these at the 60s house. It sort of bothers me to not use what I got. Not to mention the 80s house comes with new washer and dryer. My dryer is only 2 years old with my washer pushing 6 years. I think. I can't remember. So this leaves me circling around the whole bathroom thing. 3 big ones or 2 tiny ones? Ugh. Makes my head hurt.

And houses are going so fast, I'm sort of concern about waiting. But the bank is making us wait because it's just another day at the office for them while it's a complete nail biter for us. However, with these other homes just popping up, it seems it was a God timing thing that we are waiting. It's just brutal to watch stuff get snatched off the market before you can do anything about it. It's been bumpy, left us a bit grumpy especially since the furnace went out at this place and the rental company left us all weekend without heat. Yup. So ready to move.

As an extra bonus to all this stress, couple weeks ago we were out driving and I've found if I tell the guys NOT to hit a pothole, they will proceed to hit every flipping hole from here to the store and back. There was a known bad one and I said repeatedly don't hit it! Which he didn't but did hit the worse one hidden under a huge mud puddle. It was only a miracle that kept the tire from being ripped off - those new tires we just put on the car back before the snow flew. No, I'm not ticked off.....anymore. And I didn't rip the kid a new one but they should never be allowed to read the text messages I sent their dad after the whole ordeal. But now the service engine light is now on so yippy skippy on that. We've been too busy to get it into the shop and I'm trying not to sweat bullets about what it's going to cost.

My nerves - they aren't happy. Maybe it's a good thing I did get my tickets to go to the home school convention. I don't NEED to go, but I NEED the girl time away from life. That and I was informed they would show up and drag me along anyways, so I might as well make it easier on everyone and go willingly.

Wednesday, March 4, 2015

George Period

I think I may change the name of aunt flo to George. This guy doesn't play around, and quite frankly, is an absolute beast of a bully. I was trying to come up with what all George could stand for like:
G- ginormous mess
E- exceedingly painful
O- outrageously annoying
R- rage induced emotions
G- greedy consumer of chocolate
E- epic torture that no mere mortal should have to endure

I was in mid-rant about George Period when Fred made the mistake of staying there is no P in George but that's when I told him that is George's last name - Period. Nuff said. End of discussion. Went so far as to try and be addressed as Mr. Period.

The other day I had spewed forth my weirdness on Facebook about not shaving my legs in a sad attempt at another layer of warmth, but remembered from past experience that I just get all itchy and then want to practice yeti calls. Since I have to close the store the next couple nights, I decided to de-yeti so I can't be forced to try the dare of practicing this over the intercom in a sad attempt to get rid of customers early.

The struggle is real, people.

So while I was in mid-shave it sort of dawned on me that it was a wee bit disturbing that I just named a female organ and man's name. And right there I had a cramp that was so intense that it about dropped me to my knees. I think I just angered George, because if felt like he just said, "bow to me and beg for mercy, you little human!!"

Sort of a blur now, so I'm not sure exactly how it went. But meds and chocolate were administered immediately and now I will go out into the public and face the coupon crazed masses who will try to argue with me.

Maybe we should pity them, because George has declared he will take no prisoners.

Monday, March 2, 2015

I'm Not Sure That Was A Smart Thing To Do

Hey! That could be the title of my autobiography that I'll never write. But for some reason this just sings me. And now I don't know how I feel about that or what that actually means. Great. Now I'm getting depressed. Okay, I was sort of already feeling it.

One of those weird train of conversations had happened and we ended up finding our old house is for sale. NOT GOING TO MOVE BACK. Thought I would put that disclaimer out there. But we were looking at pictures of it and was surprised to see they didn't change any of the stuff we did but did some more improvements. From what we can gather someone bought it and tried to flip it but it isn't happening. They bought it 2 years ago in February. I really feel bad for them if they tried to live there in February.

Anyone remember my old posts of yore of how freezing that place was and how I had to thaw out the washing machine every other day from January to March? Anyone?

But I was sort of pouting about seeing our old house until we were talking with the bank about getting a mortgage and it turns out when you go through foreclosure and all that junk, that it goes better for you if your old house sold. The minimum is 2 years. Looks like we just squeaked through the line. Okay, that did make me feel a little better. On top of that, it looks like we might be house hunting by the end of the month.

That progressed rather quickly. I'm not entirely sure how I feel about it. We had to basically give our sad tale of woe to explain our credit history. It was rather depressing looking at the last few years however, it does show we've got some serious grit to ourselves by pressing ahead. Still waiting to see if they are impressed with all our grit.

But something that helped snap me out of my funk was Kerri and family were coming through Indy on their way to their vacation spot. We had lunch at 5 Guys and hung out before I had to go into work. It was so good to see her again and yet it was so weird too. Fred had the day off so he dropped me off and took the guys home. He came and got me. I was so grateful he did because one of the manager's car wouldn't start. I was standing there watching him like it was no big deal, while I realized I had no clue on what to do or how to do it. I would be so screwed without him. I teased him that this was why I kept him around. He got a good laugh out of that one.

Although, I'm still slightly, but not really, steamed at him. The other night we were all bundled up in bed and I went to pull a cover up over my shoulder but my hand slipped off and I ended up punching myself in the nose. And my dear sweet husband laughed so hard his stomach cramped up. Jerk. He's still giggling about this days later. I told him I will have my revenge. I got some seriously cold toes just waiting to nail him when he doesn't suspect it. Trouble with this plan is he does expect it and therefore makes sure he has the sheet as his force-field as he is wrapped up like a mummy so I can't get to him.

Diabolical! It's like he knows! 20 years of marriage has taught him well.

Reality came blasting back in Saturday at work. We were so slammed that there was a 2 hour wait to get fabric cut. And people wonder why I don't want to learn how to sew. I've had the head manager get on my case that I need to take a couple of the classes we offer. I said I would try the one on how to frost a cupcake because cupcakes are accepting unlike sewing machines because they are possessed. She laughed and told me I was funny and I tried to get away before she could press the matter. I have an annoying feeling they want me to run the customer service desk. There are still some things I don't know so I can't do it and I'm okay with that. I'm trying to figure out how soon I can leave not get promoted!

It also didn't help that a major snow storm blew in that night. It came down hard and fast! By the time we got out of the store, the parking lot was covered and the highway was a mess. At one point I got up to 30 mph. And that was so I could get my butt over to the far lane. It wasn't anything I wasn't used to but not seeing the lanes makes it hard. 4 lane highway turns into follow the tracks! Who cares where they lead! Just go!!

I walked through the door declaring I was never leaving the house again. I have a feeling no one is taking me seriously. Especially since I had to work early this morning and tomorrow is grocery shopping day.
(Insert some pathetic plea for the rapture to happen but then make a snort noise as all my other pleas have all been ignored.)