Tuesday, March 31, 2009

Well I'm Blessed

My cable went out last night right as I was putting this together. I lost most of my post but better late than never.

First off, big old smooches for all the kind words. Second off, Margie you totally made my day just to chat with you. Y'all are just being really nice. Needless to say, this cartoon is rather fitting.

I was talking with the guys during lunch and it turned into an air your issues. While talking there had been some minor angst amongst the ranks. Turns out the older two were mad thinking J knocked over their bionicles and blah, blah, blah.

After hearing all about it, I did point out that those things are not the most stable things in the world. It's also possible that anyone, or anything, could have knocked it over. Especially if it were a laundry basket that I let bang into the wall to let them know it was there and waiting for their attention - maybe that could have been the cause.

Light bulb moment of oooh.

Cue guilty look.

Apologies handed out and accepted.

However, J did not help his cause when his eyes sort of glazed over and then asked how long was I going to talk about it. Older boys started scootching away expecting me to take his head off, which I did but not to the degree that they thought.

I told them that I see how I've been too hard in some areas and that has caused me to pull back and then over compensate the other way. They both said huh, that makes sense.

And J learned how to breathe through his elbow.

Actually, I only threatened to and he was in tears and said it hurt his feelings. Had to point out that how he responds to things only makes it worse and long story short he had an oooh moment himself.

It was sort of funny because what we have going on is a bit of a personality clash. N and M feel that all little kids things are totally beneath them and they don't understand why all kids don't snap out of it.

They both admitted to having a short fuse lately. I had to ask what is it about their lives that was so terrible for the short fuses. I told them I could make their lives really rotten so they could justify their mood.

They turned me down for some reason.

J admitted that he had no clue he was upsetting his brothers. Then suddenly changes topic and says it makes him feel bad when no one will let him help in any way, shape, or form. He said it makes him feel like he has no purpose in life. I had to wonder where did he come up with this and at his age? When I was 9 I was trying to figure out which Barbie outfit I was going to try and wrestle onto little miss plastic.

And here my son is telling me he feels like he's incomplete unless he can help other people. Whoa! I have no idea how I birthed the moral police.

I was finally able to get M to talk to me what his deal was. He can't fall asleep at night and then does not want to get up in the morning. I'm not even going to claim don't know where he got it from cuz that would be a lie. It's only been about the last few months that suddenly we can't get him out of bed.

He said what really ruins his day is when his brothers come in, turns on the light, and says rise and shine or good morning sunshine. He gets this totally snarky look and in a low voice says, "Morning people are evil. Especially if they're perky."

I, of course, leaned over and high fived him and said amen.

He then confessed that N had pulled the blankets off of him - once. Again, in same tone, "But he won't do that again."

Turns out he sort of kicked him but he claims it wasn't his hardest. As if that is suppose to make it all better. When I asked N about it he said he had no hard feelings towards his brother. For his twin he will extend grace beyond anything but for J he's got one shot and one shot only per day.

Some day they'll get it. For now, everyone is getting along so that's cool.

After all of that, I sat down and my leg got itchy. N noticed and asked why was I itchy. I said because I hadn't shaved my legs, or better known as deforesting, and it makes it itchy. To which he says, "You want to see hairy? Check this out." and yanked up his pant leg to show me his hairy leg.

He then starting telling me why he is sooo glad he's a guy and not a girl. The list was getting rather long. Then he blurts out and what is up with the feminine napkin stuff?

I had to laugh. I told him he's watching too much TV. He said why do they call it that when he's never heard another person call it that. M pipes up that it's not very PC to say pads on television.

Who are these people??

N: "Glad I'm not a girl. I wouldn't buy that stuff for anyone."
Me: "Yeah, I'm sure your dad thought the same thing at your age. But now he has no problem buying some for me. Behold the power of wo-man."

This got all of their attention. "Sort of like super powers or special abilities?"
Me: "Oh yes."
Them: "Well, what is it?"
Me: "Bewbs."
Them: "Oh Mom! You're so weird."

Just thought I would give them some sort of reason to be weird. I'm sure they'll have to dig through a plethora of material but eventually they will remember that one time Mom told them she had super powers and she lied.

This mental scarring was brought to you by the letter O for oh my gosh, they've cooked my brain, and R for revenge.


Sarah said...

Too funny!

I must be lacking the superpowers...my hubby still refuses to buy those things. Should I eat spinach? Put on special wrist bands? Hold up a sword and scream "The Power of the Universe!"???

Loved the conversation recap...almost like I was there. (whispers: raising boys scares me. Guess God knew what he was about when He sent me girl(s).)

Kaye Butler said...

Oh Sarah, your girl must be young. This conversation is mild compared to what people go through with girls. Your day is coming and you should get prepared quickly. Soon some thing will snatch your precious cutie and replace her with the one eyed, one horned, flying, purple people eater.

J - you go girl! You should carry them to the store and make them buy girl stuff as punishment for not getting along.

Don't kids just surprise you sometimes? Mary Margaret donated all of her hard earned yard cleaning money to the church for some other kid to go on World Changers. All of it. Where does it come from this grown up attitude?

Sarah said...

Oh yeah, Kaye - 22 months and another one due in 2 months. loved your blog!

Dianne said...

As mother of 2 boys, 17 and 12, I would like to emphatically state that you DO have super powers. Have mine convinced they came, with their instruction book, upon their births. When they are older they will realize you do indeed have THE POWER! Long Live Mom Powers!

jubilee said...

Heh, heh, "bewbs."

Sarah, You could use the "if you really loved me . . ." arguement. JK
Maybe you need to save that for the really important things!

When I was a kid, I was convinced that my mom DID have eyes in the back of her head. My kids are only half convinced that I do.