Sunday, January 17, 2010

The Darker Side of Joanna

Got your attention, didn't it? And while you're used to my whining and complaining, this isn't a post like you think.

I would like to introduce to you the one, the only, dark creepy part of me - Hubs. He has begged and pleaded for me to keep his anonymity but most of you already know his name. And me wanting to give credit to where it is due - I'm going to rat him out.

Bloggy world meet Fred. Say hello Fred.

*sighs deeply* "Hello, Joanna's imaginary friends."

*smack* Hey!

"Joanna has been hounding me to do a guest post. And even though I've been considering it, I was at a loss as to what to say."

Funny, he wouldn't shut up the other day.

*Gives stink eye* "But considering Joanna's blog subtitle of therapy gone blog, I'm going to stick with that concept and talk about what I need to hear the most."

"With everything we have coming up this week, continued unemployment, bankruptcy filing, and court dates, the outlook seems bleak. This is something God has been teaching me and I'll share a little bit of it with Joanna's imaginary friends. And I figured it's safe since she only has 3 readers."

It's InterPeeps - get it right. And they're not imaginary. Plus, I have 5 readers - I'm moving up.

"I found a quote in Philip Yancy's book The Jesus I Never Knew that really spoke to me and where I'm at right now. "The other 2 days have earned names on the church calendar: Good Friday and Easter Sunday. Yet in a real sense we live on Saturday, the day with no name. What the disciples experienced in small scale - we now live through on cosmic scale. Human history grinds on between the time of promise and fulfillment. Can we trust that God can make something holy and beautiful and good out of a world that includes Bosnia and Rwanda, and inner city ghettos and jammed prisons in the richest nation on earth? It's Saturday on planet Earth; will Sunday ever come?"

"Of course what Philip Yancy was talking about was the Second Coming. The human race struggles in the Saturday in between His promised return and it's fulfillment. That's the big picture. But what struck me was on a smaller scale. Am I the only one that ever feels trapped in Saturday? Caught in between seeing His promises written in His Word and seeing His promises fulfilled in my life."

"I hope I'm not the only one."

"We read about His promised provision and yet the mailbox is full of overdue bills. We read about His healing power and yet the sickness remains. We read that He has His hand in our relationships and yet the distance between us grows. We read of His love for the lost and yet that loved one we keep praying for keeps running away from God. And sometimes it makes matter worse when we see answered prayer all around us. We're plagued with thoughts of why not me? Why haven't my prayers been answered?"

"It's like being in the waiting room of the doctor's office for your 9 am appointment. Here it is 4 in the afternoon, and everyone who came after you got to go in before you. You go up to the receptionist and asked if they forgot to call your name, or perhaps you got the date wrong and she tells you, "No, we haven't forgotten you and yes you're supposed to be here, but it's not time for you yet. That's why a doctor's clients are called patients."

"Am I the only one who believes that patience is not a virtue, it's a four letter word?"

"I mean does anyone really like waiting? Some people handle it better than others, but I don't think anyone likes waiting. And if you do, that's disturbing, seek professional help."

"Don't we all want things right now? And it seems that faster is never fast enough. We used to make coffee in a percolator and then it got faster with the automatic coffee maker. But that wasn't fast enough. We put timers on the coffee maker so it can start brewing before we can even wake up. But that still wasn't fast enough. You still have the horribly slow process of pouring the coffee into the mug and adding your own cream and sugar."

"Who has time for that?"

"Now we have drive thru gourmet coffee and still it isn't fast enough. "I only ordered a tall vanilla latte with skim milk, but a double dose of whipped cream and a sprinkle of cinnamon and a fresh baked blueberry muffin. How can it possibly be taking this long? I've been waiting for a full 60 seconds!"

"But we don't have much of a choice, do we? We've already ordered the coffee and we've already paid our money. So we have to wait, don't we? We're not going to drive off without our coffee since we already paid for it. We'll just sit there and gripe and complain about how long it's taking and then we won't even enjoy it. That gourmet coffee we've been looking forward to all morning is lost behind the thoughts of well it took them long enough, I'm never coming back here."

"So how does this parallel our spiritual life? We bring requests before God, we invest our time and hope in that request, and then we gripe and complain about how long it's taking God to "fill our order". So when we do get an answer to our prayer, what should have been gratitude is now "well it took you long enough, God. If it's going to take you that long to answer prayer, I don't know why I even bother". And sometimes we do the unthinkable: we just drive off without our answer. We stop waiting on God, we stop expecting our order to be filled and we just leave the throne of God, never wanting to return again."

"So many times our impatience costs us our answer. Instead of waiting for God we storm off like a 2 year old who didn't get his cookie. God has been waiting to give us our answer but our attitude has gotten in the way. I know for myself that I need to set aside my impatience and replace it with gratitude before I can expect to receive anything from God."

"Did I mention that I hate waiting?"

Believe me, that's an understatement.

"And yet I find myself waiting on my answer from God, praying that things don't fall apart around me. I now really know what God means by surrender because I cannot win this battle and have no choice but to give in to Him. All I have left is trust and it's enough."

Didn't know you were going to get a sermon, did you? I wonder if I'll ever get him to do this again. I wonder if I'll even want him to do this again. Will he ruin my blog and drop my readers down to 3? The comments will tell the tale. Please, no veggie tossing - he's fragile right now.


grandmamargie said...

Sometimes, God sends our answer immediately. But Satan's demons try to block or stop them. And it takes the angels longer to get the answers to us.

Kerri said...

Well, I've got tears in my eyes...
I can SO relate...waiting...
Is not that book most excellent?? The Jesus I Never Knew...AWESOME.
I feel the same way! Stuck on Saturday. It's like limbo...I just want Sunday to be here so we can all get on with eternity. Maybe it's selfish, but it IS SO tough to wait. Great post guys!
Love you so much.

rthling said...

I'm right there with ya, Fred.
(btw, you don't look like a Fred to me. You look more like a Paulo or something. Don't get a big head.)
I'm not really good at waiting on the Lord, either. Usually, when I realize I want something, I want it yesterday, not tomorrow, not next week, and certainly not next year! Right now my husband's job feels like a HUGE waiting game. I'm so thankful he has a job, and that they are paying for his school, but they have cut his overtime, and everyone in the company is working on about 32 hours, except Shawn. I keep expecting him to come home early one day and tell me he's been laid off. They have been laying off people every week since before Christmas.
I have had a REALLY hard time giving this situation to God. I have taken control of it a couple of times, trying to keep us from sinking, but He is still on His throne. He will see us through it. He even has a safe place for us to land, should the unthinkable happen. But I don't WANT the unthinkable to happen. I want his job to stabilize, the bills to be caught up, and the money to go out to eat again, whenever I don't feel like cooking...
(crickets chirping...)

Young Wife said...

I can relate. I feel like our lives have been on hold for a long time now while we wait for my husband's arthritis to go into remission. Praying for you guys!