Saturday, March 20, 2010

Whatcha Gonna Do?

My blog sent me some hate mail about being neglected and all. I told it to hush as it had record comments for the give away but it's feeling all needy. I don't know where it got that from. I had to inform it that I am the only diva on this train wreck and it's only purpose is to take pictures of the mess for the insurance purposes.

It's not convinced.

It has been yet another roller coaster of a week. I think I have hit every emotion on the wheel of doom as one can get. Went to bankruptcy court. The trustee was really cool about the whole thing and was done and over less than 15 minutes.

But it does mean we are on the clock as we are going to have to leave our house. The house we busted our butt off to fix up. The house we use to joke calling it Tod (This Old Dump). Yeah lots of emotions with that.

Sadly, I did get to the point if I heard one more person tell me it's going to be okay, I was ready to punch them in the face. Yes, I know that but the right here, right now what are we going to do sucks.

Ah, but there goes that negative part of me again. I did get reprimanded for joking about being homeless and wanting to find an ally with wifi. Fine. Whatever. The sun will come out - and fry all you happy positive people to a crisp! Muwhahaha!!!

See? This is why I stayed away from the blog. People freak if you say this out loud, and often. So I saw no need to put it out there to drive the 6 people who read this blog away.

I will say on a good note that after the dust settled, an entire box of Kleenex was used, not to mention all the chocolate - felt like God was saying it's going to be okay. We've been wondering if it's time to move on for a while. Just have been running into a lot of closed doors.

So Hubby is already researching and looking like crazy which is good because my way of coping is to wring my hands and run around the room screaming like an idiot.

But I will tell you this because I seriously can not make this crap up.

As we got closer to the federal building, it suddenly dawned on me that I've been there before. Only a mild wave of panic hit me and was able to keep moving in a forward motion. I kept telling myself that all that junk was in regards to my folks, not me and I would be just fine.

We go in and lets just say the security was super duper tight. When they had their 5th dude as tall as a building, and just as wide, as well as 4 other dudes armed to the teeth that came around the corner just as I walked through the metal detectors is when I had a slight thought of hit the deck. It's good that Hubby was behind me and sort of shoved me through.

Me, being the paranoid thing that I am, was moving in slow motion but was thinking in hyper-active overdrive. Thoughts like 'these guys weren't here a moment ago, why did they all the sudden show up? Especially right after I entered the area. Why are they all standing around the entrance way? Why are they eyeing me like I'm a freak? Oh wait, someone just said something. Respond stupid! And for the love of Pete don't cry, you're innocent. They don't seem to believe people anyway.'

Luckily I wasn't taken down for suspicious behavior. I was happy we were right near the entrance and not in the bowels of the building in case of an emergency escape.

Hey, you never know when you need to leave a building quickly.

We're sitting there making jokes with each other trying not to think of all the emotions wrapped up in this. About that time a couple attorneys come in and they were talking about how crazy of a day it had been there. Turns out some other yahoo was doing a similar fight that my folks did and I guess they were worried some para-military group was going to show up and cause problems.

I looked at my Hubby and he about started cracking up laughing.

My luck it would be some of my folks idiot friends. Of all the days that stupid crap like that goes down why, oh why does it have to be when I'm around it? I am really starting to get worried that poo just seems to follow me. No matter how hard I try to get away from it -bam! stepped in some more.

And y'all wonder why I tried to enter the witness protection program. I'm still slightly bitter that they turned me down. Well minus the seeing a crime and all.

I think the hardest thing about the whole week is I had a few people, and a couple relatives, make some nasty comments. Seriously do not understand why folks think if you go through hard times then clearly you are not in right standing with God. Okay, whatever.

But it does frustrate me. You go through a hard time and it seems like people line up to make you feel even more bad about yourself and your situation.

Do you know what I think about that? I'm thinking it's time to run to the border and have questionable food and go gas wally world as we grocery shop. That's what I'm thinking. Might as well make someone else gag and run away gasping for air.

Cuz that's how I roll.


Jill V. said...

I am sooo sorry girl. I can only attempt to imagine what this all might be like. I am crying with you and sending you biiiiig hugs! Love you guys!!

grandmamargie said...

I, too, am sorry all this has happened. I was sure hoping for a different outcome. Sending hugs.

Kerri said...

First of all, I love you.
Second of all, you are not allowed to move far away!!!
Third, give me the names of the people who are telling you that you are not in right standing with God. I know a guy who knows a guy...and I'M ready to whip out my poison pen as well.

People like that piss me off to no end. Those are the same ones that tell me I'm sick because I'm in sin. Well, they can bite me. They have NO IDEA where you or I stand with God, and they have NO RIGHT to make that judgement. What's that verse about removing the PLANK from your own eye before you remove the SPECK from your brother's??

I'm serious....just give me names. And e-mails. And phone numbers...

But really. If anyone comes at you again, let me at em.

Love you.

Jill V. said...

Kerri- I'm with ya ...I can't even fathom having the thought process to even THINK about telling someone that their problems are THEIR FAULT! Does ANYONE READ THEIR BIBLE!!! ARGH! And you're right about the fact that No one else knows where someone is in their relationship with God!

Joanna- Copy me that e-mail of peoples names and phones #'s...We can get a MAD MOB on their a$$ ...did I say that? I mean Butt:-)

Dianne said...

U can come live on my hill in AR because we SO ROLL the same way. And every body on this hill has read the book, so we know where God is and who is NOT perfect. Im rambling again, its the drugs. Plus Ive been in that federal bldg, too. Just remember that is YOUR TAX DOLLAR AT WORK. So own it girl!

rthling said...

Shoot! I'm more about thinking the people who keep telling you it's gonna be okay need to get THEIR tail kicked!
It's not gonna be okay! It's gonna suck! It already sucks! You hear me? S-U-C-K, suck!
Meanwhile, you just let me know who those idiots are, okay? Email me some names, addresses and phone numbers. I'll call them at 2 AM and give them a piece of my mind. In fact, I'll just go Chuck Norris on them and beat them into oblivion over the phone. You don't think I can? Well, you're wrong.
And while you wait for me to do that, have some chocolate, wring your hands, and scream.
Don't forget to cry.
It sucks.
But I love you.
(is that weird, you being a complete stranger?)

Julie said...

*sigh* ... Wish things would have turned out differently. ((((HUGS))))

jubilee said...

So sorry. Wish I had a magic wand.

I'd wish away the nastiness that some have been showing you. I'd wish away the heartache. I'd wish you into a new and improved house with no worries - and no mortgage.

I'd wish for a never-ending stack of books for you to read and a nice soft blanket to curl up in. And I'd wish you a lifetime of Dove chocolate and M&Ms that you wouldn't have to hide in a tampon box.

{hugs} and Hershey kisses,

Lorraine said...

I knew you'd be eating chocolate and that the Lord would let you know it would be OK.
And I have a friend who hires security for the Federal building, so if you're going again, let me know...I'll make sure you're treated right!!

Joanna said...

Aww - love ya all great big bunches.

Sunday said...

Life just sucks. Imagine how wonderful Heaven is gonna be after all of this garbage. And thank goodness there are many mansions, and our mortgage has already been paid.

Chris said...

been there. done that. haven't been homeless yet:)

Kaye Butler said...

lovin Diannes comment. BONUS if you move on Dianne's can look down the hill and see ME!!!

kanishk said...

am sorry all this has happened.
home jobs without registration

kanishk said...

I am crying with you and sending you biiiiig hugs! Love you guys!!
home jobs without registration