Wednesday, August 11, 2010

Oh My Cheezers!

I think I my have my heartbeat back to normal. The other night after I sent the troops off to bed, I decided I better shovel those dishes out of the sink. When my folks were up, typical of my Mom, she took my sponge that I use for dishes and started to scrub down everything.

Thanks Mom.

Now say that in the most dripping sarcastic tone you can come up with.


I looked at my half dead sponge and went out into the pantry to get another one. I heard a rustle noise and I stopped. I listened. Heard it again. Noticed a few, ah, mouse drops around the cereal box. Do you have kids like mine? Can't fold up and close a cereal box?

So what is a mouse to do when all this bountiful goodness is just sitting there? Apparently they will move into the box. I grabbed the box and looked to see how much was left in the box when I noticed a FEW tails and FEW lumps of fur trying to bury themselves into the cereal.

It is only by some miracle I didn't launch that box across the room screaming like I was trying out for a part in some horror movie.


I didn't because I wanted them out of the house which is rather a joke if you could see the back door. I ran out the door and slam dunked it into the trash dumpster. Trouble is that the dumpster was pretty full. I'm sure they waited a bit, finished off the cereal, and then came back in the house, convinced they had some bad acid trip cereal.

Needless to say, I threw away all the cereal.

This did inspire me to clean like never before. After slamming back a few LiftOff drink (shameless plug) I had the energy to do it. I do clean but the guys I live with make it look like I don't. Ever. The spider monkey love we have going on, combined with the dust bunny Tarzan swing, certainly doesn't hold my claim that I clean. But I do!! I have the dishpan hands to prove it.

Which I have to ask if this happens to anyone else. Can anyone tell me if their dirty dishes multiply every time they walk by them? Just me, isn't it?? I knew it!!! Darn those nasty dishes.

Anyway, it was during this cleaning session that I came across my pink NIV Women's bible. It was sort of cool cuz I had all these flashback backs of all the lessons I learned studying that bible. My kids were little - starting school - and it all came flooding back. All the memories where right there. I had to stop in mid-clean and just hug it. Had a good a cry over it too.

I know it's sort of weird but this is how I am. Deal with it!

I tried to get Hubby to take a little stroll down memory lane with me. It was a very short walk as I was accused of being hormonal.

When will they learn? If you suggest, or even think, it's a hormone day than it will become a hormone day!

Since I wasn't feeling the love, and I just battled mice, cobwebs, and general grossness - I suggested we run to the border since it was time for the loading of the carts. Why yes, I was feeling spiteful. Why do you ask?

The new taco where you squeeze the lime? Not a fan of it. Didn't like the wrap. If they would have used their normal flour wrap it would have been fine. It was like eating raw corn tortilla. I wasn't happy with this so I was really hoping to have some serious revenge at stuffmart.

Believe me, we needed every bit of stinkery we could muster. The place was a zoo!

While I wasn't able to take anyone down, Jared was able to come through for the team. I mean dude was a trooper! Thought he might have sharted himself but once the steam evaporated he was good. And he scored extra points that he made sure to set the stank free way behind me so I didn't have to commando crawl through the green cloud of doom.

The boy loves his momma! Cuz that is just love to go to the back of line to cut one off.

Even after fighting off the masses with super stank power, we were still stuck with craziness. I have never seen so many people clogging up the lines before at stuffmart!! Our favorite cashier was super busy too. We still went to her line and she said everyone has been out school shopping. That was part of our loading of the carts. We had gone to Old Navy earlier that day to see if we could find the booty reader but no luck. I did manage to muscle my way in a pile of jeans and scored a few for the guys. With men's jeans marked down to $15 they now have some happy booties.

They begged me not to put that so mums the word, a'right?


Julie said...

I WOULD have thrown the box screaming! There is NO DOUBT about that!!!!!

Joanna said...

I have just been informed that the electric mouse trap is flashing - as in caught one. I might hurl. But my FIL will be so happy to know his gift is still giving.

Kerri said...

"Booty reader?" Do tell!

Joanna said...

Kerri - Old Navy commercial. The booty reader says, "Your booty is smiling from cheek to cheek."

Young Wife said...

AGH! I'm so impressed you didn't scream and hurl that box!