Wednesday, July 10, 2013

I Don't Think I Can Come Up With A Title For This Mess

Been an interesting few days. And by interesting I mean Fred had to take over and said, 'get it done or we're contacting a lawyer.' Cuz that's how he rolls. I'm still fluffing my feathers.

Although, I did get into a bit of a cat fight on the phone. I can call it a cat fight as there was close to hissing noises involved on both ends. I was told that the a/c guys might not be out until Thursday as emergencies come first and I may have gone off that we are now an emergency or we're gonna sue your arse if you don't do your freaking job. Cuz I guess that's how I roll.

What can I say? She caught me at a bad time. Nothing will unhinge a person more than when they have sweat sliding down both their butt crack and their bewb crack. Not to mention she's called like 4 times in the last month to say someone would come out only to have no one show for various reasons. I even pointed this out to her and she didn't appreciate this observation and got a bit snippy with me.

Clearly, she's new here.

I wish I knew what it is exactly I said, because the a/c guys were out here by 10 a.m. Which I do find funny because the bathroom guys were supposed to be here at that time which they turned out to be a no show. So when they knocked on the door and said they were for the a/c, I may have squealed in delight which sort of scared them....a bit.

But they got it all up and running and we have sweet cool air flowing through the house. I'll leave off how irony decided to show up for the party by having a thunderstorm blow through knocking the temp down to the low 70s. I don't care, I'm still running the a/c. This house doesn't get air flow through it no matter how many windows and doors we leave open. Plus half the windows don't have screens.

I'm now washing up every one's bedding to try and get rid of the nasty sweat smells.

I'm hoping everyone will be able to sleep well tonight. No one has gotten much sleep from all the sweating which leads to tossing and turning. Needless so say, angst has been on a slow boil. Always a lovely mix when teenagers are involved. Especially when one of them has hormones more unstable than my own. Which I'm about ready to smack him. I can almost say it's not entirely his fault. Anytime I try a new vitamin and/or supplement, it throws my whole cycle off track. This leaves those grumpy 'I want to kill you all' type feelings that we use to know when they would show up, to now take on more of a ninja form where it's any one's guess.

Never a dull moment around here.

Especially when the 14 yr old doesn't have enough sense to not slap the angry/hormone crazed bear.

I'm sure this is penance as I have mild flashbacks of doing similar things to my mother.....and I'm still not sorry about it.

 Maybe I can get a therapist to take pity on me and take my case on for free.

Speaking of free and therapy - my adopto sissy was down for the weekend. We were talking about bewb sweat and bewby holders and what have you. There is an article going around that has been on both Facebook and Pinterest about getting properly measured. I was telling Sissy this and how it has made me have happy bewbs now since I was wearing the wrong size. I'm still floored about it because I thought the lady was totally making this stuff up when I read the article.

Long story slightly short, I made her measure herself and showed her how her bewby holder wasn't doing her girls any favors. So the quest for bewby holders was on and her skinny little self can't even get her size at a normal store, but we stayed the course and found some for her at Vickie's den of devils.

(We know she has no secrets. Just saying)

She now sends me text messages that her bewbs are happy and loves me - in a non creepy way. I think Oprah said like 90 some percent of women are wearing the wrong bra size which I didn't believe. Gasp! I know! I think I broke some sort of girl code for not believing Oprah. Turns out, she was right and I was one of them.

So now in spite of all the other crap going on, I will now have cool, happy bewbies. Because bewb sweat is just unpleasant.

I was telling Fred all of this and it was a train of thought that turned out like -
Me: Do you think the word cleavage is made up?
Fred: *pause* why?
Me: Because boob crack seems a bit out there.....especially if she has a lot of boob.
Fred: *rolls eyes*

He is a patient soul.


Kellan said...

Just dropping by to say HI - to see if you remember me? I've missed you - hope you are doing well! Started a new blog - we'll see if I actually keep up with it. Kellan :)

Joanna said...

Kellan!!!! Of course I remember you! Missed you too. I'm glad you're blogging again. Seems like all the greats have stopped and now I have nothing to read which means I have to face life and I'm not thrilled with that. :)