Wednesday, September 21, 2016

Why Did I Even Think This Would Be A Good Idea?

I just had an entire list of things that went through my head that fits all in that category. Now I'm kinda of nervous because that wasn't supposed to happen. My list of things to do just took a dark turn and now I want to run away from the beast and go hide under a blanket.

Sadly, life just isn't going to let that happen.

Even sadder still, I'm not sure if I've blogged this before or if I just thought about a blog post but never got around to actually posting it.

Welcome to my brain! Things may, or may not, make sense at any given....SHINY!

Where was I? Oh yeah. So Hubby dear saved me from my stupidity once again. We have a game plan for pharmacy week that is in October. Please read that carefully - OCTOBER! Pecan Pumpkin Loaves galore. Only to have same dear Hubby tell me that it was employee appreciation week and suggested we do it immediately. As in that day.

Once I stopped laughing so hard I realized he was serious. That's when I told him not happening. I then felt bad as I was the idiot that came up with all these suggestions of what we, meaning me, could do. I offered to do a couple batches of cashew bars instead and we were back in business. Until George decided to weigh in on this decision rendering me in a not great mood. It didn't help said bad mood when I discovered that dude oopsidentally put the corn syrup in his briefcase along with a couple other SoBe bottles. He said it was 5:30 in the morning and had just worked a double, so all bottles look alike at that time in the morning.

I'm amazed he can even focus!

But I only had enough to do 1 batch until he got home, which left me staying up late to get it done as momma taxi was once again on the road as 1 guy had worship practice, 1 kid had youth group, and the other 1 had the car so I can't pawn it off on someone else to take them. I need a nap. And another vehicle, Lord - please and thank you!

While that was baking up, I was trolling scrolling through Facebook when I noticed my MIL had posted this really cute sunflower wreath how-to on her wall telling a friend it was better material to work with. I did a 4th of July bandanna wreath that turned out cute so I decided to give this a try. And happy day! I got a 25% off coupon from Jo-Ann's. Except it expires tomorrow which means I need to go today because I think I have something else going on tomorrow. So all that happened last week. Fast forward a few days because it took me a few days to survive the carnage. I'm still finding this gold mesh stuff all over the place.

If you feel you have nothing better to do for the next hour or so, go on Pinterest and do a sunflower wreath search and then sit back and watch a few youtube how-tos. I would like to say that they really don't let you know just how behemothly huge this sucker turns out to be. I'm talking it was bigger than the freaking door it was supposed to hang on huge. Needless to say, I took it apart and tried again. I would like to add that my cheap butt did NOT buy the 2 rolls it suggested because it was 15 bucks a roll and the wreath looked a tad bit bald as I spaced out it out on the different ring.

When my eyes landed on that price tag, it was that moment when my mother's head popped up and started telling me that when you do something, you do it nice and the best of your ability. And that's when I said yeah, "but I don't have that much ability OR your talent and reckless spending tendencies so 1 and done," then tossed it in the buggy and kept moving.

I had to keep moving because I said that last part out loud, as I tend to do, and I think I scared a lady.

I should point out that MIL was not joking about material being a bit hard to work with and whathaveyou because GAH! I didn't do the burlap mesh because I couldn't find it and if memory serves me right, it's more pricey. I skipped getting the bag of fuzzy twist ties because I had other things to buy and I thought I was going to be able to tie it like I did the bandanna wreath.

That's a big no there, Captain!

This stuff was not going to be tied off like fabric. In a panic, I sprang to the trusty everything goes draw, but not to be confused with a junk draw. This draw has all my bread twist-ties that I tend to save because I have reasons and possibly some issues. But I can hold those stupid issues together nicely because twist-ties! But I wasn't going to use up my stash on a flipping wreath. Somehow we had some flimsy twist-ties that I'm pretty sure would not pass any twist-tie inspection if there were such a thing; and I can't remember how long they have been sitting there. I looked upon them, and they up at me with a deep desire that had been long denied. Today was their day. Their day of glory! The stuff twist-ties can only dream of! I knew in my heart that I'm not that great at crafts. It was in this moment of craft weakness that I embraced my married into redneck genes that gets encrusted on you when your love slips on that ring and grabbed those sad looking twist-ties and got my craftiness on.

I ended up having to put all of it on 1 ring instead of spreading it all out because 1 roll thankyouverymuch. But it covered up the hickerbilly ties. However, when it came time to do the center part of sunflower - fill in any type of doom and gloom music you can muster. It wasn't working. That hickerbillyness stepped up to the plate and said hold my tea, which is girl speak for hold my beer, I got this Cletus! I ended up taking a Walmart bag stuffed with other Walmart bags to make it a poof. I then tied the poof the wreath. I cut out some brown felt, hot glued in on the poof and then hot glued some little pine cones on the brown felt. It turned out cute but the underside of this thing screams ghetto. I kid you not.

My mom was commenting on how nice it looks until I flipped it over to show the underbelly of ugly hoping she would be proud of my hickerbilly ingenuity. She busted out laughing so bad I'm pretty sure she peed herself a little bit. Once she could properly breath again, she asked why in heavens name didn't I cover it up better. When I asked what did she mean, she hung the wreath back up, closed the door, and pointed out that you could see the ghetto through the glass part of our door.

So much for my hickerbilly ingenuity. But it is cute. Thankfully, it flattened out a little bit when I closed the door, but it's still super poofy.



I finally figured out how to a picture. And I'm pretty sure spellcheck hates me right now because it is screaming at me that most of these words aren't real. I beg to differ spellcheck, and clearly you need to get out more.